Despite What My Mother Might Think

Being single is a very odd thing. It is especially odd when your friends have all these really funny, ridiculous dating stories. Meanwhile, you have none. Well, next to none. This seems to be the trend of my life. When I first meet people, they always ask me about my dating life or how many boyfriends I’ve had. The older I get the more awkward it is to tell them that I haven’t had a boyfriend since the eighth grade. It’s not that being single for so long is such a horrible thing, although I do have my moments. It’s actually been a hugely positive learning experience. I think it’s more about the looks I get, or the fact that I don’t have many of my own stories to tell when my friends are talking about their array of dating situations. I feel almost as if I refer to the same one or two date-like situations I’ve been in, and I’m sure all of my friends have caught on to this. And the looks, OH the looks! The looks, along with the exclamations, in reaction to me stating that I have been totally single for seven years is always entertaining. The frequent “But you’re so PRETTY”, “No guy deserves you” and the occasional “Well, you could always try girls” never cease to make me laugh. Yes yes yes I know, I’m fantastic and beautiful and hilarious (not to brag, but really I am) but let’s get real here. I am normal looking, I am definitely not so dreamy that no man is worthy, and despite what my mother may think I am in no way a lesbian (it just isn’t for me). It’s just time. I’m sure it sounds absurdly corny but I truly believe it just isn’t my time. It hasn’t been for a while, and I understand that. I’ve come to terms with it. I am fortunate enough to say that I enjoy my own company. I love myself, and I grow to like myself more and more every day. I have literally had years to figure out what kind of people I gravitate towards, how much “me time” is too much, and what the hell goes on in my head. When I get to the point, I won’t have to work so hard to distinguish if I’m acting a certain way for me or the person I’m dating; I already know myself. I’m lucky enough to be comfortable in my own skin whether I am completely alone or surrounded by hundreds of people, and I don’t think many women my age can say that.